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The Victim Mindset
Problems with the victim mindset
The Daily Habit For Doers
“It does not matter what you bear, but how you bear it.”
- Seneca
I recently posted the following on my Facebook…
My intent was to encourage people to travel more — because it’s something I love to do and I want other people to enjoy it as well.
But someone, a friend of mine, actually, responded with the following comment…
He’s right.
For many people, traveling is a lot more complicated than “making it happen” — and this is due to a growing wage gap in America as well as overpriced education and medical systems.
However, it’s telling that this was this person’s gut response.
He’s right. But he’s also playing the victim.
From a macro level, it’s good to recognize the things that are wrong in the world and to work to correct them. We should all work to create a fair, kind, and compassionate society by electing the right individuals, voting, and even protesting.
HOWEVER…
From a personal level, it’s not healthy or wise to focus on the things we don’t have control over. That energy is far better spent on personal solutions rather than blaming and finger pointing.
And how a person spends their mental energy — as an optimist personally or as a pessimist holistically — is often indicative of how happy and successful they are.
As Daniel Kahneman writes,
“If you were allowed one wish for your child, seriously consider wishing him or her optimism…
Optimistic individuals play a disproportionate role in shaping our lives. Their decisions make a difference; they are the inventors, the entrepreneurs, the political and military leaders…
The people who have the greatest influence on the lives of others are likely to be optimistic and overconfident, and to take more risks than they realize.”
He concludes: “When action is needed, optimism, even of the mildly delusional variety, may be a good thing.”
If you want to do something exciting — no matter what it is — there will always be a million reasons that you shouldn’t do it… or that you “can’t.”
But it’s all BS.
It might take some time.
It might take some energy.
It might take some grit.
But you can do whatever you set your mind to — or at least, you can do a hell of a lot more than you probably give yourself credit for.
Which is why this was my response…
What is your gut reaction?
Do you come up with excuses for why you “can’t” or “shouldn’t” do something? Or do you slowly and steadily work toward your goals, ignoring the haters (inside and outside of your head) all along the way?
It’s obvious which path will take you further.
It’s also obvious which pather is easier.
Choose the hard path. Stop making excuses. And start working for the things you want (even if the odds are against you).
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